6.11.2014

Twosome.

Noun: a pair of people considered together.

As Lana Del Ray sings, I am convinced that the world was built for two; sadly the older I get the more apparent it becomes. Visibly since more and more the ones around me are forming pairs and leaving me in the dust. Kidding, I take ninety percent responsibility for my single status. Regardless of who or what is at fault, it's increasingly becoming discouraging. To add to the long list of reasons why it sucks to be single, as of recently I have discovered something new. Groupons.

Somewhere along the way I assume I signed up to receive email after email of groupons. Rather than immediately place them in my junk folder, I tend to glance at the offers on a daily basis. The truth is, there are some really great deals out there. The problem is that the majority of them are often for a group of two. In all fairness, this halts my want of spontaneity as I can hardly ever make a purchase before first confirming with a friend if they would like to join me on the escapade. All because I'm single. When you're in a relationship you have a constant plus one. Even if the boyfriend may not want to participate in the sunset picnic dinner included with an afternoon of horseback riding, sexual favors can always sway a man ;)

I'm considering making some purchases and attempting to use them alone. Why should the couples have all the fun?

Wine tasting for one please.

What are you doing this weekend? I'm going on a romantic getaway by myself.

I know the meal is for two, can't you see my imaginary boyfriend?!

Merde.
 
 

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