2.19.2013

Conflicting.



Verb: 1. Be incompatible or at variance; clash
         2. Having or showing confused and mutually inconsistent feelings.

Does everything have an opposite?  If everything has an opposite, then the opposite of there being an opposite of everything, is that there is not an opposite of everything. Despite your opinion about the exception paradox, I think it is safe to say that every benefit of being single comes accompanied by a difficulty. These drawbacks seem to be more noticeable the older I get, most likely due to the fact that more or less everyone around me is in a committed relationship; and getting married.

As much as I enjoy having a bed all to myself, sometimes, mostly on cold winter nights, it can get lonely and cold. Some body heat would be nice. Some cuddling would be nice.

I have never been a morning person. I don’t think I will ever be a morning person. For this reason, I set three
alarms. When I had a boyfriend and we shared a bed it was nice to have someone coax me out of bed in the morning. Morning team work is always a positive, especially when it comes with coffee in bed.

While the topic is on mornings, let’s add lack of sex to the list. This is a big dilemma in my single life. There, I’ve said it. No need to elaborate.

No one is around to appreciate your lingerie. No one is around to buy you lingerie.

I’m not trying to make myself feel better when I say that I have really great friends. I can’t help what’s true. However, having really great friends sometimes just doesn’t compare to having a boyfriend. Particularly when the good friends have their own boyfriends. A boyfriend is like a permanent partner in crime. He won’t ever turn you down when you really want to go see that certain movie no matter how dumb it looks and he won’t ever say no to last minute Sunday brunch when you’re craving blueberry pancakes (even if he has eaten breakfast already). Right?!

Being single sometimes forces you to spend a Friday or Saturday night alone while everyone else is having ‘date night’. This usually ends with finishing a bottle of wine (solo). This usually never ends well for various reasons; frequently because of drunken texting (which you later regret) and/or waking up with a massive wine hangover.

Last year I attended seven weddings. You would think that being single and attending weddings would be a fun occasion. After all, isn’t a wedding the ultimate place to meet other singles? NO. Attending weddings on your own once you reach a certain age is anything but fun. At least every second person has some sort of comment about when your turn will come. Furthermore, if you are caught on the dance floor when a love song comes on you are required to walk back to your seat in shame as everyone else couple’s up.

Sometimes being the third, or fifth, or seventh wheel just isn’t appealing.

Woe is me. Time to wrap up my tirade about why I hate being single. My constant inconsistency causes me to question myself. Am I happy being single (as I think I am), or am I merely trying to convince myself?
MERDE.

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